A man was taking a housewarming gift to a co worker, from the hospital where they worked. He knew Karen Skellas, 45, had recently separated from her husband Ioannis Skellas, 49. He knew that Karen Skellas had moved in with her daughter and she had also told him that her husband had abused her in the past and/or had threatened her recently. But he says that Karen Skellas was waiting to see how Skellas reacted to the impending divorce before filing for a protective order.
The man went up to Mrs. Skellas’s door and when she answered he gave her the two bags of groceries he had brought as a housewarming gift. A man in a hood came rushing up out of nowhere. His first thought was that it was like a Halloween prank. The hooded man began addressing Mrs. Skellas in Greek, Mrs. Skellas said “no, no” and said something else in Greek. There was a shot from a sawed off shotgun, then another.
The hooded man moved down the block a ways and reloaded the shotgun, went back to where Mrs. Skellas’ bleeding body lay in her doorway and then shot himself. The hooded man was her husband Ioannis Skellas.
After the first shot, the visiting man ran down the steet to seek shelter with the neighbors, but when he went to the door, they were too frightened to let him in.
Aquaintances say they never saw any signs of problems with Skellas and that he had kept to his regular habits in the days before the shooting. Though one aquaintance did say that Skellas had asked him if he knew an investigator a few days before the shooting. He told him he did not, and Skellas came back the next day and said he had taken care of it and he did not need an investigator anymore.
The time between leaving and divorcing (or in relationship without marriage, the time immediately after ending it) is turbulent. There are a lot of turbulent emotions going on. Yet through it all, many have the feeling they do not want to make it worse. Many do not want to see the other in jail or with a protective order, unless it gets worse. So there is a wait and see time.
During separation, problems in the relationship will get worse. Obsession, jealousy, anger, control issues will become exaggerated even if both sides are in favor of the divorce, but if one is against it- it is much more intense. The situation will get worse before it gets better. If it gets to the point of rage, then there is the possibility of an impending tragedy.
Take precautions for safety. Take any threats seriously. If there has been jealousy, abuse, obsession, or control issues in the marriage then a shelter is a necessity. It is always better to be too cautious than not cautious enough.
With time, the relationship will even out. But plan on for a while after separating, plan on the fact that all problems will be exaggerated.