She didn’t want to see him anymore

Emerson Whitted, 30, had reportedly just been paroled from prison (some reports say he was released on Friday morning) where he had served time on a charge of drug possession. And his girlfriend had allegedly just broken up with him. Reportedly the two had dated off and on for some time.

Alledgedly he went to her home looking for her on Friday. She wasn’t there, but her grandmother  Marina Rodriguez and a 22 year old friend of the girlfriend were there with her two children ages 2 years old and 6 months of age.

Allegedly an argument developed and Whitted picked up a vase and broke it over the head of the 22 year old friend, then pulled a knife and slashed her in the neck. He then turned to Marina Rodriguez and began stabbing her multiple times.

The friend ran out of the apartment, ran downstairs and got a security guard. When they got back to the apartment, Whitted has allegedly inflicted several stab wounds on himself.

Mrs. Rodriguez was reportedly a grandmother who had raised two granddaughters by herself. She was prounced dead at the apartment.

The friend was taken to the hospital, where she was admitted. Some reports say her wound was superficial and that she was in stable condition, some reports say she was in critical condition.

Whitted was also taken to the hospital and is reported to be in stable condition. He has been charged with murder, attempted murder, and criminal possession of a weapon. He was on parole.

1010wins.com                                          nypost.com        

silive.com            newsday.com                           nytimes.com                     

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She lived long enough to tell

A neighbor has said that she heard 5 gunshots on Wed. night about midnight. When she heard  Shannon Hallabrin’s boyfriend pounding on doors and calling for help she called police.  

Police who responded found  Shannon Cynthia Hallabrin, 34, collapsed and bleeding. They say they know who the shooter was, as Shannon Hallabrin told them just before she died. After talking with officers briefly she was taken to the hospital where she was later pronounced dead. They say there are no other suspects. She told officers that 34 year old John Edward Dudley AKA “Big John” was the person who shot her. By the time police arrived, Dudley was no longer at the scene.

Reportedly Shannon Hallabrin and her boyfriend were at the home when Dudley barged in and shot Hallabrin with a handgun. Hallabrin staggered into the front yard and collapsed. The current boyfriend was not harmed.

Some say they had never seen any problems between the former boyfriend and girlfriend. Some say the two would bicker, but they never thought anything like this would happen. Others report they knew of problems between the two. Some neighbors have stated that Hallabrin was being stalked by Dudley.

Shannon Hallabrin was reportedly an outgoing and generous woman and liked by her co workers. Co workers say they knew there were problems, but she did not go into a lot of detail about them at work.  

Police found Dudley walking along a highway on Fri. and he was placed under arrest. Police say that Hallabrin was shot three times in the back, and the gun has not been recovered.

sanluisobispo.com                          santamariatimes.com

sanluisobispo.com         keyt.com              sanluispo.com

Another Survivor Speaks

She tells how it began, she tells why she stayed, and she talks about what happened. She talks about leaving and going back. Then she tells how she got out. She also talks about what life has been like in the 18 years since she left.

news.kypost.com

There are ways to maximize a person’s chance of safety in a domestic violence relationship. While they are not guarenteed, they can maximize a person’s chance at safety. In the links to the left, many of the sites list suggestions for a safety plan. And domestic violence agencies can also help with that.

Suprisingly enough, there are safety plans for persons who are in a violent relationship, to help in maximizing safety even if they are not ready to leave the relationship. One example would be to try to avoid arguments in the kitchen or garage, because of the easy availability of weapons. There are also suggestions for how to make advance preparations in case you have to leave suddenly because of a violent episode.

And of course, there are suggestions on how to prepare to leave the relationship for good.

Everyone has the right to make their own decisions on if or when to leave. But if you have to leave,  either temporarily or permanently, you may not have time to make those preparations. The more prepared you are in advance, the safer you will be.

Why do they stay?

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In learning about domestic violence, that is a question that always comes up.

The below is an excellent article on women who don’t leave an abusive relationship and is very much worth reading in it’s entirety. It is an opinion article, and while I may not agree with every point, several good points were made. A couple of good points they make is that to even ask the question is a subtle way of blaming the victim for the abuse. If they hadn’t stayed they wouldn’t be abused, right? They were asking for it right?

However, the reasons a woman stays in the relationshiip can be very complex, and while everyone may not agree with the reasons they are real and valid for the person in the relationship. To place the blame on the victim for not leaving, is to excuse the abuser. After all if the victim left, there wouldn’t be anyone to abuse, right?

Domestic violence is a criminal act, and is not ‘excusable’. They are actions that can and should be punishable by law. Blaming the woman for staying with an abusive person is like blaming a rape or mugging victim for being where they were when they were attacked. Maybe it was an area that was not known for crime, or maybe it was a ‘bad’ part of town. Maybe they lived or worked there. Are they to blame for being attacked?

news-tribune.net