Paternity issues

Amy Woollard, 28, reportedly had a brief relationship with 33 year old Richard Monroe Scheibe. And she had an 8 month old baby that he is believed to be the biological father of.

Reportedly on Monday Woollard left the home she shared with her current boyfriend to meet him at a church parking lot. The two were allegedly meeting to talk over “financial arrangements and paternity issues” while Woollard’s current boyfriend stayed home with her baby.

During the meeting, Woollard’s current boyfriend made two calls to her, and she told him she was ok. But when he called around 5:30 pm, there was no answer. And when she had not returned after an hour and a half, he went to the church to check on her.

He found her car still running in the parking lot. But she had been shot to death. He contacted police. Police believe that the person who shot Woollard attempted to make the shooting appear to be a suicide by leaving some unspecified items in the vehicle. But they say that suicide did not fit the crime scene which indicated she was slain in the parking lot. 

Police questioned the current boyfriend, but they say they believe that he is what he appears to be- a concerned boyfriend and they released him.

Police then arrested Richard Scheibe in connection to the death.

http://www.startribune.com/467/story/630011.html

http://www.kstp.com/article/stories/S18347.html?cat=1

http://www.kare11.com/news/ts_article.aspx?storyid=132658

http://www.twincities.com/mld/twincities/news/15336607.htm

When it comes to fatherhood, many men who were eager to lie down, aren’t so eager to stand up. It is the woman’s fault they believe. Not their fault they will say. She should have done something to prevent getting pregnant.

If a man doesn’t want to be a father at that time, or with that partner- he has options. He can refuse to participate until he is sure that precautions are taken, or and better yet- he can take the precautions himself (and as a side benefit male precautions also protect against disease). Even most high schoolers know this.

Once a pregnancy develops, don’t assume that she will have an abortion. And once the baby is born, both parents are responsible for the child. So plan on a request for child support.

Now Scheibe is arrested for the death of his child’s mother. If he is convicted, his child will be growing up without him. His child will also be growing up, not remembering a mother or a father. He will not see his child come running to him when he spots him. He won’t be seeing his child grin adoringly at him in that special relationship between a child and it’s father. And he won’t be hearing the child say “My Daddy!” He won’t be grinning at the mischievous things it does. Someone else will have those pleasures. But if convicted, he gets out of paying child support. Pretty poor payoff if you ask me.

Steve Huff has addtional information on this and it really is a must read. CrimeBlog.US

Advertisements

Violating a restraining order

Allegedly Matthew O’Connor was due in court on Wednesday on charges that he violated a restraining order against him making contact with his ex- wife. He won’t make it to court.

Allegedly Matthew O’Conner broke into his ex-wife’s apartment at 6:30 am. After pointing his gun at his two daughters and his 3 year old granddaughter, they fled the home. One of the daughters started to go back. But she heard shots fired.  

When police arrived they found the bodies of Matthew O’Conner and his ex-wife both dead from gunshots wounds. Police believe that O’Conner shot his wife then turned the gun on himself. O’Conner had a history of possessing explosives, so a bomb sniffing dog was used in the apartment and found two smoke bombs.

http://www.ksat.com/news/9722550/detail.html

http://www.woai.com/news/local/story.aspx?content_id=AA7B7F23-FD23-48D2-AE18-60591116097B

A desire for control is often very apparent in domestic violence incidents. And anything that threatens that control will often be met with rage and/or an attempt to regain control. Sometimes through “wooing”  with gifts and promises. And sometimes with force.

A partner leaving means a loss of control. And a retraining order means an attempt to prevent re-establishing control. It can/will cause additional anger, and to some will present a challenge. As long as the partner thinks the restraining order will protect them, they will resist control- so in order to attempt to control again, in order to respond to the restraining order- they will seek ways to get around the order. As has already been noted, the restraining order is merely a tool for prosecution. It is not a guarentee of protection.

If a restraining order is necessary, then steps should be taken for safety and protection. Often it means taking shelter in a domestic violence agency. Sometimes it means taking other measures of protection. There are links on the left to some help for ideas about protectiing yourself. But I also reccommend that people who take out a restraining order should also make contact with their local domestic violence agency. They know the local resources, they can assist with the planning, and they are often the fastest route to any needed resource. And they can help in advising and explaining court procedures, assisting in decision making and act as advocates. Note I said that they assist in decision making. Decisions are always left to the individuals, but they can often be a good source to bounce ideas off of and to point out strengths and weaknesses in a decision.

I was thinking. 6:30 am in a sleeping household. Typically the house is fairly quiet, soft breathing noises, maybe the occasional snore. Soft noises like the hum of a refrigerator or an air conditioner. There would be enough light when you woke, to realize there was a man with a gun. And to recognize him. While fleeing from the home, I cannot imagine the fear they were going through. And at the sound of the shots, no one would have to tell them. They knew what happened.

It is often said that soldiers in war choose daybreak to begin a suprise attack, because that is when people sleep the soundest. And when roused, it takes them a little longer to waken, shake the confusion, and appropriately respond.