Disabled spouse

James Foraker's wife was disabled and in a wheelchair. She is partially paralyzed and only has the use of one arm.

Tuesday one of her relatives contacted police. She had been bathing her one year old daughter when her 6 year old child told her that Foraker was holding his hand over his wife's mouth and nose. The relative went to the room and tried to talk to the victim. She noticed that the victim's face was red. But Foraker wouldn't allow her to talk to the victim, and forced her out of the room.

Later she walked by their bedroom and allegedly saw Foraker with a pillow over his wife's face. His wife appeared blue and was gasping for air.

The relative tried to call police on her cell phone, but Foraker allegedly grabbed it from her, so she ran to a neighbor's home and used their phone.

During the police investigation of the allegations, they determined that on Sat. Foraker had also been seen placing his hands over the mouth and nose of the relatives 1 year old daughter.

Foraker was arrested and has been charged with attempted first degree murder, third degree assault, two counts of endangering the welfare of a child and offensive touching.

http://www.delawareonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060531/NEWS/60531016

http://www.delawareonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060601/NEWS/606010369/1006/RSS

Remember in the marriage vows, that little line that says for "better or worse"?

Now I know that having a disabled spouse must be beyond difficult. Besides the physical care that would be required, there would be a financial burden for medical care and special equipment and etc. But there is also emotional pain of seeing the person you presumably once loved, confined to a wheelchair with problem after problem after complication.

And there would be a physical deprivation as the spouse would no longer be able to share physical satisfaction as usual in a marriage. So I can understand there would be a lot of difficulties that I can only imagine.

But in this country, there are options. There is divorce, abandonment, and everything in between. Yes,family and friends may be displeased if these would occur, but eventually the spouse would live down most of the disapproval and be able to pick up a different life. It happens, and most people know that a disabled spouse would be something almost unbearable.

But this guy evidently wasn't satisfied with just walking away from it all. He evidently wanted the whole thing to go away- permanently. But life doesn't work that way. Killing someone (or attempting to kill someone) doesn't make the problems go away. It just gives a whole new set of problems.
Instead of a carefree life, away from the difficulties of a disabled spouse, he is looking at jail time. 

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3 Comments

  1. Soobs said,

    June 2, 2006 at 5:53 pm

    What is really frightening, is that if he’s willing to attempt this while someone was there, what has he done in the past, when no one was around? And to try and kill the 1 year old? What the hell was wrong with him?

  2. Bobbie said,

    June 5, 2006 at 6:57 pm

    The 1 year old is not the relative’s child but that of the accussed and victim involved. Makes you wonder if relative cared so much in first place why was the police not called at 10:30amish when the relative’s own child supposedly saw the accussed holding his hand over the victim’s face.

  3. June 5, 2006 at 7:13 pm

    I wondered about that also Bobbie. Especially when he wouldn’t allow her to talk to the victim and forced her out of the room. The only thing that I could think of was maybe she wasn’t sure of what she saw, and meant to try to talk to her later when she could get her alone. Thanks for the information about the 1 year old.


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